Your internet disconnects in a poker tournament when you have Ace King of hearts. You reconnect and the very next hand you’re dealt two aces and double up. Four hours later, your sitting heads up with a 8:1 chip lead and shortly thereafter, you go on to win the tournament. You find out later that your opponent had two aces when you timed out with Ace King suited, meaning you would have probably gone broke. It’s a blessing in disguise and experience them daily; not just at the poker table.

Since I have recently moved to Parma, Italy, its been quite the change of scenery. The quaint town of Parma resides an hour south of Milano and is home to Parma ham (prosciutto)
and parmesan cheese. As you can imagine, the city boasts some of the worlds best food. While my experience here has been quite an adventure, it has taken me quite some time to adjust to the contrast in lifestyle. Sometimes, the things that frustrate me most about America I end up missing, and the things I thought I loved about Italy, I resent. To help illustrate, I have complied a list of the10 best and worst things about life in my new home town!

The 10 Best Things About Living In Parma, Italy

1) Italians are in absolutely no rush allowing for a more stress free existence.
2) It’s a toss up between the women and the language.
3) It’s home to the worlds best food.
4) Without a stable internet, I am forced to try new things and experience the culture.
5) Sitting in coffee shops is a required pastime.
6) It’s quaint and charming.
7) Walking and biking are the preferred methods of transportation
They practice “siesta.”
9) I haven’t met a single American in the past month.
10) Parts of town are 2,000 years old and it has a ton of history.

The 10 Worst Things About Living In Parma, Italy

1) It takes forever to get anything done.
2) With amazing food and no gyms, you have to be prepared to gain 15 pounds.
3) They don’t have many familiar foods that I’m used to such as: sweet potatoes, pancakes, soy milk, smoothie stores, almond butter and oatmeal.
4) The internet is entirely too unstable to work consistently.
5) Productivity suffers when every meal takes 3 hours.
6) Everyone smokes.
7) You can never buy more than you can carry, so I run out of groceries everyday.
Nothing is open when you want it.
9) It’s hard to make friends in a different language.
10) Because everything is so old, Parma lacks many conveniences such dryers, dishwashers, microwaves or air conditioning.

It’s ironic that what can sometimes be the worst part about the city, is also the best. During a discussion with my friend Luke “Redline” Kim, he said it plainly, “you can’t have it all.” The little things that give the city charm such as the historic buildings means that you’re going to wait five days for your jeans to hang dry. On a cold rainy Sunday when all you want is to curl up and watch movies, you literally have no choice because everything is closed. On the other hand, when you’re hungry at 3:00 pm on Monday and request to eat, the Italians look at you like you’re from Neptune because nobody eats until 8:00 pm. Life in America is completely different than Italy. While it thrives on conveniences and service, in turn it lacks culture and history.

The best part about living and experiencing a new country is just that; it’s all new. You are forced to live outside your comfort zone and to learn and understand another culture. Since moving here, I have learned more about myself and have become better at adapting to unfamiliar situations. Whenever I’m having a culture breakdown, I always try to keep in mind that the Italian way of life isn’t necessarily better or worse than my decadent existence in California, it’s just different. I can choose to perceive these culture differences in a positive or negative light, and how I do determines the experience I’ll have. So instead of bitching when the concierge at my hotel tells me that a city with a population of 500,000 people has no gym, or when you ask when the internet will be working and they don’t know because the engineer is sleeping, or when you walk twenty minutes to the fish shop only to find its closed because the owner didn’t feel like coming to work today, I’ve learned to smile, take a deep breath and say, “you know what, it’s Italy.”

Perhaps this telling adage is most relevant when we travel or experience something new.

“We see as we are.”
- Buddha

A typical meal in Parma, Italy

The Cavor Cafe, where I spend three hours a day

The historic piazza outside my apartment

The T-Cafe where I enjoy writing and cappuccinos

As always, you can email me at alectorelli@gmail.com. You can follow me on twitter at www.twitter.com/alectorelli

Ciao,
Alec